Hearts at Home

To my children, it's 84 days of freedom. To me, it's 84 days of hearing "Mom, I'm bored."

Those fun-filled or patience-testing 84 days (depending on your point of view) are also known as - summer vacation.

With Memorial Day weekend, "the unofficial start of summer" just around the corner, now is a great time for moms to plan some activities for their children as well as some time for their marriage, their friendships, and themselves.

Over many summers, via the mentoring of many moms, and even through a Hearts at Home workshop on summer activities, the following is a strategy I learned to plan activities for sometimes busy, sometimes bored children -- as well as some tips concerning mom amusements during school summer vacation.

Three is Key - Our family's cardinal rule for summer includes the "three is key" philosophy. Each of my children can only be involved in three primary activities.

Primary activities would include camp, summer classes, a sport or lessons.

More than three primary activities add unneeded stress to the whole family.

For example, my oldest is going to a Christian camp, pursuing an art enrichment program, and participating in a summer music program. My other children will be taking swimming lessons, enjoying a summer class, and attending vacation Bible school.

Filler Thrills - Filler activities fill time with fun when children cry, "I'm bored." My kids write down fun activities that take little planning or money on slips of paper, which we place in fun jar.

When they're bored, we draw a slip and do that activity. Examples of filler thrills would be a water fight, finger painting outside, ice cream for lunch, and flashlight tag.

Teach Each - The mind is a terrible thing to waste - especially during summer vacation. Library reading programs, nature walks, day trips to historic sites, and making cookie recipes that need to be converted are all good ways to "teach" during summer.

The Electronic Era - The lure of computers, video games and television all vie for our childrenÙs attention every day, but especially during summer. After noticing electronics dominating the summer, I issued electronic tickets every week that are worth one hour of computer, video game, or TV time.

When the tickets are gone, so is any more electronic time for that child for the week. But, I do give extra tickets as rewards for good behavior.

Trade Tasks - During the summer, my children trade their regular tasks a.k.a. chores for new ones. I possess more time during the summer to teach them how to run the vacuum, sort laundry or clean the bathroom. Then, once school begins, they already know their new tasks well enough to need little supervision from me.

Separated Schoolmates - With differing schedules, it may be difficult to make sure your children stay connected to friends from school who may not live in your neighborhood. Try taking turns inviting a friend along to the pool, park, or plan an overnight once a month for each child to nurture those relationships.

Marriage Moments - Block out a weekend for a romantic getaway or at least choose several date nights each month to nurture your marriage. With the kids home 24/7 for 84 days, your marriage will need the peace and quiet of a few evenings away, too.

Ally Appointments - Other moms with kids at home for the summer are your allies. They will need a break from their 24/7 routine as much as you do.

Make some phone calls now to propose joining forces for some afternoons so the kids can play while the moms talk. Or better yet, plan an evening out with your mom friends while your husband minds the children.

Calm Mom - Moms tend to remain calm more often when they take time to recharge by being alone on a regular basis. So arrange time to be alone -- somehow -- during the summer.

If your children are small, hire a teenage sitter to watch them once a week while you do something you enjoy - not errands. If your children are older, hire the oldest to watch the younger kids. Even consider rising half an hour earlier to spend some quiet time alone.

Summer vacation (all 84 days of it) can be days that try a mother's soul or may be days of delight - or at the least days of diversion -- for your children. With some masterminding right now, you may, hopefully, experience more delight than dread this summer.

Mary Steinke speaks at retreats and moms groups, teaches Bible studies, writes many Hearts at Home newspaper articles, and serves on the Publishing Team for Hearts at Home. Before children, she worked in full-time ministry as chaplain in such diverse settings as nursing homes and prisons. Mary resides in Normal, Illinois, with her husband, Harry, and three sons.

Scheduling Summer Sanity was originally published on May 18, 2002, in The Pantagraph.